The Muslim Housewife.

We’ve all had a child fall and get hurt, sometimes it ends up being a big boo boo and sometimes a small one.  Whatever the case, Moms and Dads usually do anything to soothe the child and make them stop crying.  We may try different distraction techniques like give them a candy or show them their toys, or maybe even tell them we’ll take them outside.

In reality there is no better way of soothing a child than with the words of Allah.  Since coming to Egypt (Subhanallah its almost been 6 months, quite unbelievable!) Ahmed and I started something new with our daughter Isra.  We started reciting Surah Al-Fatiha upon the spot she would  get hurt.  Subhanallah the moment we would start reciting the surah she would immediately calm down.  This is anywhere from a small fall on the ground to really big boo boos.  About a month ago we went to Chilli’s for dinner.  There was a play area in the back where they had a moonwalk and a swing set.  Of course Isra wanted to sit on the swing so Ahmed took her to play for a little bit.  The swings were not really toddler proof so Ahmed had to stay with her and literally hold her on the swing, it was still quite enjoyable to her lol.  Anyways, Ahmed turned around for a split second and she ended up flipping onto the floor.  Her lip busted and her nose started bleeding profusely!  As you can imagine she was screaming on the top of her lungs not only from the pain but from the sight of the blood as well (my poor lil baby!)  As we tried to stop the bleeding I  put my finger on where she got hurt and started reciting Surah Al-Fatiha.  And within minutes Isra immediately calmed down and stopped crying-Subhanallah!

I think this is a great habit we can implement with ourselves and our families, after all Allah is the one who heals.  It’s really amazing how easily one can make things into habits with children.  As I said I started this about 6 months ago, about a month before Isra turned one, now whenever she gets hurt she waits for me to recite Surah Al-Fatiha or she say “Momma, Momma Allah o Akbar” meaning Momma recite!  Sometimes I’ve even caught her reciting upon herself when she gets hurt (she can’t recite the surah yet but her equivalent is to say “Allah o Akbar”)  and lastly when she sees Ahmed or I get hurt she quickly runs to us, puts her hand on our boo boo, says Allah o Akbar, blows on it, and gives it a kiss…May Allah protect her!

                                                                        Surah Al-Fatiha

As many of  you know I have officially moved to Michigan.  Alhumdulilah it’s nice being home.  In the beginning there were times when I went out to run errands kind of forgetting I was in Michigan, and when I would run into people I knew it was a pleasant surprise.  I have been staying with my in laws and make trips to visit my family every few weeks, I forgot what a great blessing it was to be able to go see my parents whenever I want, Alhumdulilah.

Living with my in laws has been a nice experience Alhumdulilah.  When you live with someone you build a relationship with them that cannot be built over the phone.  It’s a nice time to understand your in laws and get to know their likes and dislikes.  I feel you build a true relationship with your in laws when you live with them for a period of time.  In this day and age many daughter in laws become hesitant to stay with there in laws even if it is for a temporary time.

Now a days there are some women who put a wall up between their in laws and themselves.  This is the start of a bad beginning.  One must understand that although differences may occur your in laws are your husband’s family and they deserve to be respected.  Often you hear of the stereotypical mother in law who is overruling and always involved in your relationship with your husband.  I am not denying that there are some mother in laws who fit in this category, and these type of mother in laws need to realize that these sort of relationships are not about a power trip, instead they should be relationships of comfort and love.

People also need to realize there will be times of disagreement and misunderstanding, but then again things like this happen when you are human and it doesn’t mean its the end of a relationship or end of the world for that matter.  As Muslims we need to deal with situations with the best manner.  And even if your mother in law is wrong and you’re right it doesn’t mean you need to go the extra mile in a disagreement to prove your point.  The following hadith opened my eyes:

Abu Umamah narrated: Allah’s Messenger Messenger (pbuh) said. “I guarantee an abode within the boundary of Paradise for one who gives up arguing, even if he is right; and I guarantee a home in the middle of Paradise for one who abandons lying even for the sake of fun, and I guarantee the sublime portion of Paradise for one whose conduct is good.” (Abu Dawood)

I think this is a good enough reason to hold your tongue in matters of disagreement!

I have been seeing and hearing a lot of divorce occuring in our Ummah.  And in a few personal cases that I know of, most of the time the couples have a good relationship, but it was the interfering of in laws that drove the once happy couple apart.  Are petty differences worth a divorce?  The Quran states a beautiful ayah,

“And not equal are the good deed and the bad.  Repel evil by that deed which is better; and thereupon, the one whom between you and him is enmity will become as though he was a devoted friend (41:34).

What a wonderful advice from Allah SWT Himself!  Subhanallah!  I believe many relationships can be saved if this beautiful advice is followed.

I leave you with a piece of advice my dear father gave me when I got married 6 years ago.  “Beta (my dear daughter), remember if you want a blissful marriage make your husband’s family as if it is your own.”  Alhumdulilah I followed his advice, and by the grace of All Mighty Allah, Allah has blessed me with a good marriage.

May Allah protect my husband’s family, May He give them all the good in this life and even better in the hereafter!

As the boxes pile high, and the apartment gets emptier day by day I have come to realize the move to Michigan is around the corner. This move is quite a big deal because it is one step closer to the bigger move in life, the move to Egypt to study abroad.

I am originally from Michigan, so I guess you can say I am returning to my hometown. I have been in Chicago for a few years and have met the most amazing people. People that I can call true friends, friends for the sake of Allah. Chicago is a special place for me, its a place I came a few months after I graduated, a place I had my first child, and a place where I had many happy moments in life, Alhumdulilah. It makes me very sad that I have to leave, because truly Chicago is a place I like to call home. This reminds me of the other day when my dear friend Liv and I were having breakfast together at Maxfield’s. I had told her that Chicago has been a very happy place for me, and she said something that really touched my heart, she said inshallah Farah you will have many more happy moments wherever you are in life. When she said that I had to try very hard to hold my tears back.

On a happier note, it is nice to know that I will be returning to my family and friends in Michigan. It will be nice for us to spend some time with everyone before we leave. I know it is going to be very hard for our parents and siblings to see us leave and I know that deep down inside they are hoping for a change in plans. Ultimately Allah is the Planner and he decrees what is to happen, all we can do is hope and pray that the move goes smoothly.

When I pack my last few things away I know its not just for some days but for a few years. The thought gives me butterflies of the excitement to come. This has been something my husband and I have been wanting to do for some time. And we have decided that this would be a great time to take such a venture. There are days where I have mixed feelings about leaving, thinking of my family, friends and belongings that I will be leaving behind, but it is a great opportunity to study abroad, an experience of a lifetime. I know we will look back and be happy we made the decision we made.

I’d like to give a big shout out to all of the people I have met while living in Chicago, especially Qabeelah Wasat, my fellow Al Maghribers. You all are great people mashallah. Please do keep my family and I in your duas as I will keep you in mine inshallah!